{"id":303,"date":"2021-01-15T18:59:47","date_gmt":"2021-01-15T18:59:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/?p=303"},"modified":"2022-05-04T20:41:47","modified_gmt":"2022-05-04T20:41:47","slug":"table-etiquette-for-diplomatic-personnel-in-seventeen-scenes-by-suzanne-palmer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/?p=303","title":{"rendered":"Table Etiquette for Diplomatic Personnel, in Seventeen Scenes by Suzanne Palmer"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Table Etiquette for Diplomatic Personnel, in Seventeen Scenes <\/em><\/strong>by Suzanne Palmer (Asimov\u2019s SF<\/em>, January\/February 2021) opens with Station Commander Ennie Niagara of Kenlon Station having dinner with the Ijt ambassador, an avian like alien. Niagara listens to the Ijt\u2019s account of the previous commander\u2019s fall from grace (a food related incident involving the serving of ghost peppers), and learns that his actions were designed to get rid of the Joxto, a troublesome race of aliens, from the station. The conversation closes with the ambassador\u2019s news that the Joxto are on their way back.
Multiple plot elements and characters are then introduced to the story: two aliens, Qasi and Baxo, set off the fire alarms when they try the human custom of fondue (the latter creature is unknown to the rest of the station, and lurks in the air ducts); then a spaceship arrives with a Captain Vincente, who comes with official news of the Joxto\u2019s imminent arrival; meanwhile, a body is found in engineering, which turns out to be the previous station commander . . . .
After this the stories trundles along while the investigation proceeds. More characters are introduced (two security officers, Mackie and Digby, as well as a Dr Reed). There is an alien fruit ceremony that Ennie attends before later going to her office and finding a piece of fruit that Bako, the \u201cghost alien\u201d has left there. Then Vincente gets news from Earth that there is an assassin on the station looking to kill the Joxto.
After the fruit left in the commander\u2019s cabin is identified as a particularly delicious one from Tyfse, a planet destroyed previously by the warring Joxto and Okgono, this all eventually resolves (spoiler) in the station\u2019s garden ring. There we find out that Fred the gardener is plotting with the remaining surviving Tyfsian to sell the fruit it has saved from its planet, in return for assisting it to kill both the Joxto and Okgono. The story closes with Ennie confronting both races about the genocide.
This is an okay story, I guess, but it\u2019s plodding as its title, goes on too long, and generally felt like a dull \u201cSector General\u201d1<\/sup> story with trendy pronouns:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat is because I have not yet added the [fondue] heat source,\u201d Qasi said. \u201cI wished to test my understanding of the processes and equipment, and also refine my selection of sauces, before I invite an entire party to participate in the experience. I will even invite the commander!\u201d
\u201cWhat is the heat source, though?\u201d Bako asked. Ey rotated eir head upside down so ey could peer at the underside of the pot, long whiskers bent back. \u201cSome sort of thermal pod?\u201d
\u201cNo!\u201d Qasi said, her long tail twitching behind her from the excitement. \u201cThis is the very best part.\u201d
She pulled out a small metal can, took the lid off, and slipped it between the legs of the stand under the pot. Then she grasped the small pull-tab on the side between two claws and pulled.
Flame jetted out of the top of the can, engulfing the pot. Bako skittered away on all eir two dozen legs, screeching in alarm. \u201cIt\u2019s supposed to be able to be modulated,\u201d Qasi said, trying to get close enough to see without burning her own whiskers. \u201cI probably should have read the instructions.\u201d
\u201cFire!\u201d Bako shouted. \u201cYou made a fire! On a space station! This was a terrible idea, Qasi!\u201d  p. 79<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

I can see why you might use these pronouns for a human character, but why use them for (to our view) a genderless alien instead of \u201cthey\u201d or \u201ctheir\u201d or \u201cits\u201d? It\u2019s an unnecessary distraction.
Another thing that irritated me by the end of the story was the continuous mention of food. There are numerous occasions where various characters are eating, and one of these, where a minor character is stuffing a burrito into his cakehole, just destroyed my suspension-of-disbelief. I thought, \u2018They are still eating burritos on a distant space station hundreds of years from now?\u2019
I also didn\u2019t much care for the lazy contemporary dialogue and thoughts that the characters sometimes express. Apart from the likes of \u201cHoly shit that\u2019s good\u201d and \u201ccrap ton of energy,\u201d we also have twaddle like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The coffee machine was, in one of humanity\u2019s oldest and most sacred covenants, fair game, with the caveat that if you finished the pot, you set it to make another.  p. 84<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

I usually look forward to Palmer\u2019s work but this was disappointing.
** (Average, barely). 15,150 words.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. The \u2018Sector General\u2019 series, by James White, were stories about a hospital in space which treated different types of aliens. There is a list on ISFDB<\/a>\u2014read those instead.
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Table Etiquette for Diplomatic Personnel, in Seventeen Scenes by Suzanne Palmer (Asimov\u2019s SF, January\/February 2021) opens with Station Commander Ennie Niagara of Kenlon Station having dinner with the Ijt ambassador, an avian like alien. Niagara listens to the Ijt\u2019s account of the previous commander\u2019s fall from grace (a food related incident involving the serving of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[94],"tags":[17,50,4,7,95],"class_list":["post-303","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-suzanne-palmer","tag-17","tag-50","tag-asimovs-sf","tag-novelette","tag-suzanne-palmer"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/303","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=303"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/303\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3801,"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/303\/revisions\/3801"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=303"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=303"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfshortstories.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=303"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}